The story of Tasogare, the female Akatsuki
by 2ollux'2 2crewed-up blackrom
Summary: In a universe where every thing is normal, the Akatsuki are genderbended into the oppisite sex where they call themselves Tasogare. Very amusing and funny as hell.
1. Chapter 1

These are the characters!

Olive:  
Crazy, spazzy, and the feminine equivalent of Tobi  
Looks: Short, black hair, big boobs, always wearing goggles.

Akuma:(Devil)  
Artistic, explosive, anger management problems, feminine equivalent of Deidara  
Looks: Long, blonde hair tied back into two pigtails, always wearing eyeliner and mascara.

Kami no Bara:(Paper rose)  
Quiet, serious, masculine equivalent of Konan  
Looks: Short blue hair, yellow eyes

Shokubutsu:(Plant)  
Cannibalistic, Multiple-personality disorder, feminine equivalent of Zetsu  
Looks: Black half of head shaved very short, green hair, white half has long hair, yellow eyes

Toraburu:(Trouble)  
Childish, leader, feminine equivalent of Pein  
Looks: Long Orange hair, pulled in ponytails, purple ringed eyes, piercings all over

Ningyo:(Puppet)  
Quiet, blunt, feminine equivalent of Sasori  
Looks: Short red hair, brown eyes

Murasaki:(Purple)  
Insane, Jashinist, feminine equivalent of Hidan  
Looks: Shoulder length silver hair, purple eyes

Sutetchi:(Stitch)  
Serious, kept to herself, feminine equivalent of Kakuzu  
Looks: VERY long black hair, red eyes with bloodshot whites, very tall

Sakana:(Fish)  
Silly, never serious, feminine equivalent of Kisame  
Looks: Blue hair tied back in a bun, gray eyes, blue skin

Sakkaku:(Illusion)  
Quiet, very violent, feminine equivalent of Itachi  
Looks: Very short black hair, black/red eyes, lines across(Like Itachi's)


	2. Chapter 2

"I can't believe you, un!" Akuma shouted at Murasaki, who was halfway across the hideout. "Can't fucking believe me for what?!" The Jashinist yelled back. "I NEEDED that scroll, un! And whaddya do? THROW IT IN THE LAKE, UN!" Murasaki rolled her eyes. "You're over reacting, Devil-chan." "DON'T CALL ME THAT! I'LL BLOW YOU-" Akuma was cut off by Olive jumping on her back. Murasaki started laughing. "You'll BLOW me?! Hell, no chica! I'm not a lesbian!" Akuma kicked her mental partner across the room. "UP! I'll blow you up, un!" "That's what she said." "You bitch, un!"

After a while of quarreling, Toraburu came into the room. "God, you guys are annoying. Will you just shut up for Christ's sake?!" Kami followed Toraburu into the room, folding some origami. "Toraburu, speak for yourself, you're no better." He said with a sigh. "I am TOO better!" "Not." "You're just as bad." "Am not!" "Listen to yourself." Toraburu sighed. "I still am better then them though." Akuma and Murasaki were still screaming at each other, while Olive was trying to make them sign a peace treaty to never fight again. All of a sudden, Ningyo walked in the room and clonked Akuma and Murasaki's heads together. "Shut up. I was trying to sleep. Is that the lease you could do for me? LET ME SLEEP?" She said, still keeping her monotone voice somehow. "No, stupid girl who plays with dolls." "Then put down your play-dough and I'll put down my puppets. "IT'S NOT PLAY-DOUGH!" Akuma yelled, her face getting red with anger.

"Shut up, Rapunzel." Sakkaku said, walking into the room. "I was concentrating on my genjutusu. You just broke it. You shall be punished." She said, activating her Sharingan. "N-no!" Akuma shrieked, "Pl-please not the illusion world..." Sakkaku chuckled, and Akuma screamed. After about five minutes of almost continuous screaming, Akuma passed out, and Sakana walked in to the room. "Uuuummm... Sakkaku, what did you do to her?" She shrugged. "Sent to to her worst nightmare." "Being eaten by Shokobustu?" "Close enough."


	3. Chapter 3

Ningyo sat around, eating something that she found in the back of the fridge. It always annoyed her when Akuma left food sitting in the fridge for weeks on end. "Hey, hey! Danna, un!" Akuma yelled, running in the room. "What the hell do you want, brat?" Akuma jumped back. "Whoa, grouchy danna, PMSing much?" Ningyo gave her an angry glare. "You don't know when to give up. Leave me alone. Don't talk to me, don't talk about me, don't even THINK of me." Akuma shivered. "Murasaki! Ningyo-danna is being mean to me!" Sutetchi rubbed her misty eyes as she walked in the room. "They need to learn to SHUT THE HELL UP." She mumbled. Ningyo nodded in agreement. "Maybe if we kill them..." "Stupid idea." Toraburu said, appearing out of nowhere. "AAAh! Leader-sama!" The girls shrieked, "How long have you been there?!" "Long enough to hear your plan to kill you comrades." She grunted, brushing her orange hair.

"Oh, no, no, no!" We...were...being...sarcastic..." Sutetchi said between clenched teeth. "Uh-huh..." Toraburu said with squinted eyes. "Like I would liketo kill my cute partner!" Ningyo said, wrapping her arm around Akuma's neck and rubbing her head. "Yeah, you would." Toraburu said, boredly blinking. Ningyo grumbled something pissy and walked off. Sutetchi sighed. "I'm in the same boat, huh?" "Uh, yeah."

Meanwhile...

Sakana was following Sakkaku around, saying "hey, hey, hey, hey, Sakkaku, why you so grouchy today?" Sakkaku threw a punch at her shark partner, who easily dodged it. "My sister, Gaki. That's what." "What about your emo little sister?" "She's joining Tasogare." Sakana clicked her tongue. "Well, that's not good at all." Sakkaku. rolled her black eyes. "No, it's oh so wonderful. I get to see my _beloved_ sister, and chances are, she'll try to kill me." Sakana clicked her tongue again. "What're you gonna do about it?" "That's what I'm trying to find out. This is bad."


	4. Chapter 4

"Are we there yet?" asked Mizu. "I mean, is there any water nearby?" "Does it look like it?" Gaki asked. "I know you swore revenge on your sister, but why do we need to walk through this desert?" Aka asked. **A/N Gaki=Sasuke Mizu=Seguitsu Aka=Karin Damasu=Juugo **"Because they will never suspect it! Duh!" Gaki yelled at her male partner. "I mean, seriously, my feet are hurting and I NEED to swim!" "No you don't." Aka said, hitting her head. "Yes I do." "No." "Yes." "No." "Shut up before I kill both of you." Aka shut up. "Man, you're scary when you're PMSing, Gaki..." Mizu said. Damasu just stood there looking stupid, like she usually does. I mean, she can never find a place in conversation, so what's the point? "How much do you actually have against your sister?" Mizu asked once again, 10th time in four days.

"You know how much, Mizu. Ever since that day..." "Sakkaku killed your family. Got it, got it. But don't you think it was for your sake?" "Uh, NO!" Gaki yelled. "Why the hell would she kill the WHOLE CLAN for my sake?!" "Maybe because they were dangerous killers?" Damasu asked. Gaki rolled her eyes. "That's stupid Damasu. Of course Uchiha's are dangerous. We have the sharingan." "I see your point." Aka said, shuddering. "But how did your sister have the power to kill all of them?" "That is something I will never know." "Why don't you just ask?" Damasu pointed out. "What- you fool! You don't just ask someone WHY THE HELL THEY WOULD KILL YOU ENTIRE FAMILY, DUMBASS!" "I would."

Meanwhile...

"I can sense it. It's coming." Olive said. Akuma walked by the bathroom door to the hideout. "WILL YOU STOP TALKING ABOUT YOUR SHIT EVERY TIME YOU ARE IN THE BATHROOM?!" She screamed. "Nope!" Akuma rolled her eyes. "I am going to kill you one of these days." Olive came out of the bathroom. "But-but I love Akuma-senpai..." Akuma ran down the hall. "NINGYO NO DANNA! OLIVE IS TRYING TO RAPE ME!"


End file.
